Power Talk

Company, I submit for your consideration that negative conversation has the power to motivate and steer your actions. I experienced borage of negative and unproductive conversations this week that continues to remind me to always #actprofessional amongst my enemies in the workplace AND act as if there is a third person in the room. Gossip in all forms is negative whether in the workplace or anywhere else as its originate from ill intent. Cornerstone Group wrote a great article The Danger of Workplace Gossip  that presents clear definitions and how to’s; number 5 is my favorite.

Gossip can be transformed into your very own ” Power Talk” by turning inward and reflecting on yourself and next move. What next move? Exactly, rather than participation, deflecting or trying to refrain from gossip, remove yourself entirely and recall why and what are you here on this earth to accomplish. Your purpose made manifest in your life’s journey will require focus and removal from places and people. Idle people tend to talk the most to cover up what they don’t know; however, the less you say naturally provides an opportunity to direct your part in this “Power Talk”.

In proper perspective to reach greater heights, your appetite for cheap thrills must be elevated to the finer desires you purpose for or be introduced to a power player that can change your path leading to success. Whatever chapter you are in life; your “Power Talk” should be used to review a goal, talk a walk in the park to regroup, connect to likeminded individuals, finally finish that personal project or make decisions to refine your circle of friends or not.(upgrade your circle)

My participation in gossip this week convicts me to always #actprofessional and keep in mind that standing for a higher purpose requires healthy isolation and focus. I challenge you to be mindful of your words, intentions, and participation in the daily borage of negative and unproductive conversations and the cost of your future with the time you have. How will you monitor your speech and intentions this week? keep evolving.

Law 25 and 20

Company, welcome back as we explore two of The 48 Laws of Power (1998) a non-fiction book by American author Robert Greene. Let’s review the 25th law relevant to living your best life today! Law 25 is about recreations of self and identifies how people gain power over each other through manipulation and power games. Although power could be seen as the central theme of this book, why not use the power knowledge creates for your benefit.

Recreation costs and you should not be fear opposition in the form of haters at any cost, rather keep your values and goals “the” priority and those who belong in your life will remain. Apple is one of the most successful companies and internationally recognized brand in the world that continues to recreate its value to the market thus attracting power seamlessly. Many articles in Forbes business mention in some form that to find a market fit, recreation is necessary; how have you recreated yourself and personal value in your life?

Two strategies; start small and experiment to achieve growth but before thinking about the how-to’s; next lets address mindset about your opposition #haters with Law 20 – Do not commit to anyone; a foundation needed for the success of Law 25. Put another way; how you handle haters and view your circumstances is a preview of your successes or failures. The opposition is your teacher, not an enemy; be firm in separating people who matter and those who come to destroy you.

Starting small is necessary for various reasons most notably it allows for quick life hacks and/or experiments leading to micro wins. Additionally, it’s the best way to stay relevant and innovative to maintain and showcase value to yourself 🙌🏽. Secondly, decide on changes you want to try out and basic success criteria to measure. Avoid endless planning; instead, rapidly think of the idea of change and test them out; like a new marketing campaign for your side hustle or how to read 10 books in a month. Test and repeat your ideas before going big and making a permanent change.

The topic of this blog post was inspired by Company Rules blog election as #12 into the Top 100 Life Blogs on the web. Take a moment and explore other amazing bloggers sharing their passion for world impact, keep evolving.

Life Blogs

Say Goodbye

Company, please welcome DJ Antonio Fresco a long-time friend sharing his experiences and addressing self-limiting beliefs from his perspective as an empath, while remixing his life’s journey. Let’s begin with a question: How do you address self-limiting beliefs or being highly sensitive to situations in today’s world?

In honor of Mental Health Month, it should be mentioned that the worlds’ consciousness continues to grow as millions of people are finding and creating ways to take care and of their mental health. Life is our greatest teacher guaranteed to give you challenges that will test your values, beliefs and will to thrive; reminding us that the way you processed and handled change determines the position in life; good, bad, better or worse.

Empaths are highly sensitive individuals, who have a keen ability to sense what people around them are thinking and feeling. Fresco shared with me his self-awakening and side effects of inner work and growth as an empath ( check out the interview transcript here). Consider saying goodbye to these self-limiting beliefs as experienced by Fresco and ask yourself are any of these applicable to me regardless of your ability to empathize with others or not. As you evolve all the things you want will be placed right in front of you; the gag is “PAY ATTENTION”


****Warning: self work and healing is not for the faint of heart****

Self Limiting Belief 1: I must live up to the typical societal norms and expectations of my gender. (interview transcript question 1)

Self Limiting Belief 2: My success is limited to resources, location or people. (interview transcript question 4)

Self Limiting Belief 3: It makes more sense to follow a well-worn path than trail blaze my successes. (interview transcript question 2)

Self Limiting Belief 4: I have to be in control of everything and detail for my plan to be successful. (interview transcript question 8)

For information about DJ Antonio Fresco, check out his social media and world class tunes at http://www.antoniofresco.com/

Welcome Guest: DJ Antonio Fresco

Welcome, Antonio DJ Antonio Freso

Company Rules is pleased to chat with you about life and your rules for motivation and hope. Meeting you in Dallas post 5-6 years ago, I remember vividly your passion and love for music and your intention to share “your” music with the world. Most recently this month boldly shared your experience and journey which inspired praises among your followers and caught my attention as I relate 100%. Chat with me on “10 questions for impact!

1.    What have you learned about yourself this week?
   Great question. I never knew how much of an empath I was or have become. I was just in the movies the other day, watching a movie, and I found myself tearing up several times, which has never happened to me before. You know in American culture, we teach our boys that if you cry you are a “SUCKA” or a “PUNK”, so suck it up and deal with it. But, it was a powerful scene in the movie and I could feel the emotion of the moment and started tearing up. I have learned that I am in more touch with my emotions than I thought, and they like to show themselves at times…LOL!

2.    Most recently I read you moved to Miami from LA by way of Dallas where I was initially introduced to you. What prompted the move?
    In short, I am just on my journey, just following my path. That’s the real answer. But here is another part of that; I’ve been in LA learning how to be a better music producer and songwriter. During that process, my music has started to reflect more of who I am, and where I come from. I was raised in Baltimore, but I have Dominican & Puerto Rican roots. So, I starting putting those strands of DNA in my music. From the music that I just released, you can hear the Afro-Latin & Caribbean influences, as well as those Pop & EDM vibes in my music. Miami is the perfect place to be for that music to live and be created. It’s where I belong. 

3.    Since your spiritual awakening tell the Company the side effects of growth and how you continue to adjust?
    Its was and still is a BIG ADJUSTMENT! At first, I had gone to deal will all the emotional baggage and false beliefs that I’ve been carrying around my entire life. There were times I felt like my life was being ripped away from me, and there was no end in sight to this process. Everything I thought I had figured out was false, and the things that I’ve been running from was exactly what I need to face to grow. A lot of times we, as people get excited to grow, but they call it “GROWING PAINS” for a reason. You got to experience some of those pains to grow. Now, I tend to look at situations, good or bad, as to why this is happening FOR ME instead of TO ME. It helps me see why I am going through a particular situation and deal with a certain aspect of myself that I may need to let go, or embrace.

4. How easy was it to pack up again and move to Miami?
    Actually, out of all the moves I made, Miami was the hardest of all. Moving from Baltimore to Dallas, was easy because I had my job on the radio and a support system there to help. Moving from Dallas to Los Angeles, was a bit harder, because I left my radio job and I didn’t have a job I was going to. But I ended up driving for Uber and Lyft to support myself while I was studying and working on my craft. With Miami, I knew it was coming up because I was seeing and hearing all the signs for Miami. While I would be doing for Lyft, I would see Florida License plates all the time, which is CRAZY to me, because FL is 3,000 miles away from California. But I would see 6 or 7 of them every day. Then everyone would just randomly start talking about Miami out of nowhere. So I knew the move was coming up fast for me, I just didn’t know what I would be doing, or how I was gonna pull it off. But everything worked out and BOOM…here I am! 

5. What’s one thing you want to share about listening to your inner voice?
     Our inner voice is one of the most valuable tools we have in life. The crazy thing is, the more you listen to it, the more obvious the next move, or non-move becomes. The more you ignore it, the quieter it becomes and things become more cloudy at times. When I find myself not knowing what to do, that’s when I do nothing and wait until I can hear that voice again, and suddenly, things are clicking again, and I am in that FLOW!

6. Music is life and I know this to be true from our interactions, have you figured out your life’s’ purpose?
    I always knew music was always in my purpose since I was a young child. But for me, it was more about finding my “true north” or direction. Now, I know exactly the type of music I want to put out, I found my sound, and even the kinds of things I want to have my records say. The type of DJ/Artist I am now is so much more focused, verses before, things were all over the place. I was chasing “what was hot” or what I thought the “next sound” was in music. But I was disregarding how I truly felt about the music. Now all that just background noise to me, and I’m all about expressing who I am. 

7.    2020 is in sight, what plans do you have for continued self-growth and your music?
  Right now, I am working on my EP, and getting things prepared to release that. I am having fun with that whole process and just following the steps. I am starting to meet people who are in line with that same goal, so it is exciting to start building that team. So in terms of 2020, it is starting to look like an exciting year, and I want a lot of it to be all about the music and the people that enjoy it. I plan to be on tour and playing shows for sure, so getting back in the clubs, is something I am excited about as well. I enjoy DJing and watching people having fun, but now, I am throwing my music in the mix, and to watch people enjoy themselves and let go to something you created is an out of this world feeling.

8. What advice do you have for someone struggling to just let go and live life?
    I’m not gonna lie, its a struggle at first, because we are so accustomed to “trying to make things happen” and “forcing situations.” But I would say, start small, even when it comes to hanging out with friends. Try and just see where the day/night takes you, without expectations. You will be surprised what happens when you just let go and let things flow in your favor. We are all energy, and if we paid any attention to what we learned in Science class, energy loves to take the path of least resistance. It’s a lot easier to flow downstream than it is to swim against the current. Just ride that wave.

9. How are you comfortable in not knowing what’s going to happen next?
    Honestly, I am becoming more and more comfortable, but I am not gonna lie, I have to catch myself at times. Every now again, I get frustrated at times, and start tripping, because that is decades worth of old programming that I am still trying to undo, so it is constantly a new level of surrender that I am working on for myself. I will say, life has started to become less stressful for me, I don’t even trip on things that used to set me off before. So that’s a positive.

10. How do you feed your soul and find joy?
    First off, when I am making music or DJing, I get excited the most. But I find myself doing things that I didn’t know I loved all these years. Now, I go to the beach by myself, and just relax and enjoy listening to the waves crashing. I love going hiking or taking a walk, which by the way, I picked that habit up from living in Los Angeles. I also found myself reconnecting with baseball, which is one of my first loves. Over the years I have gotten away that for whatever reason, but I have recently realized how much I missed it and adore it. ***Insert any Dominican/Puerto Rican baseball joke here*** LOL! I enjoy my time with myself more than before, because I feel that’s where my inner voice speaks the loudest to me, and I get those thoughts of inspirations and that intuitive guidance of what needs to happen next.

Interview: 5/10/19

Check out Freso , his captivating beats, his blog, connect, follow and join La Familia

Nothing Can Dim Your Light

Company, when life brings you lemons do you make lemonade? What happens when a series of tragedies, lose and let downs plague you? How do you deal and are you mentally equipped to handle it? I stand before you today on my 37th birthday as proof that anything is possible even in the midst of loss, hurt, frustration and let down. By now you know I refer to the use of company rules and practices and its similarities in dealing with life matters and this post is no different; let’s work!

Have you heard of Brand Rehab: How Companies Can Restore a Tarnished Image ? This article by Knowledge @ Wharton identifies key components of turning your lemons into lemonade. Away with wallowing in self-pity, the time has past and come back around for making significant changes in your life on the path to your best self. My favorite rehab suggestion in the article is “Letting the Dust Settle”; as someone who likes to “handle” things there comes a point when “doing” becomes unproductive and you are just on the hamster wheel.

Take care to know that unfavorable situations are an opportunity to rehab instead of sitting back in fear, reliving past failures and allowing negative thoughts to overcome you. Essentially when you re-frame the narrative, there lies the advantage to rehab yourself and everything around you; keep evolving!

Key takeaways that you should review every day

  1. Be rational; review the facts not feelings, focus on your core values and kill anything not serving you. (one bad apple does spoil the bunch)
  2. Pay attention to your strategy for success. (there is nothing wrong with asking and seeking help)
  3. Details, Details and more Details; don’t be vague about your goals, details lead to refining for the best course of action.
  4. Seek advice; TD Jakes, John Rohn, and other thought leaders deliver powerful works of motivations and action steps to grow and keep your mind sharp.
  5. Learn to let the dust settle; refrain from swift action and take time to reflect.

Expectations are Killing You

Company, expectations are fundamental and help us maintain boundaries from people we meet, family, friends, and loved ones. Typical employers expect their employees to demonstrate positive attitudes, dependability, continual learning, initiative and cooperation for their businesses to thrive. Fortunately I have high expectations of myself and others; unfortunately creating healthy boundaries that honor is problematic.

Let’s look at expectations and boundaries, is it the same thing? Did the egg or chicken come first? Expectations is a belief that someone will or should achieve something and a boundary is a limit of a subject or sphere of activity. By definition neither is the same however both govern one another i.e. setting a boundary for yourself implies expecting the people in your life to respect and act within the limits? Respect and limitations are null and void when you don’t uphold or take action to maintain your peace.

My struggles with boundaries originate from little self-value while my outer demeanor screams HAIL THE QUEEN! These two dichotomies cant coexist with each other and coming off the heels of a painful lesson in early 2019, I am continuing to take steps in give less f**** and a reminder that I come first! Yes I will and Yes we can; how does this short read on “expectations” resonate with you and relationships dear to you? Is there room to establish healthy boundaries or deliver notices of contract nonrenewal to people who just didn’t make the cut? Keep evolving!

There is Pleasure in Waiting!

Company, I’ve been challenged lately with my impatience and its affects on my mindset; are you patient? I realize my expectations of people, personal goals and conquering my to-do list has interfered with my joy. Companies plan a year or more to deliver a product to the masses while planning the next move. Creating realistic goals, adjusting my expectations and reminders that good things DO come to those who wait, is a daily practice teaching me to embrace waiting.

According to dictionary.com patience is the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset. Although there are levels to patience depending on the situation, patience is a life skill to your survival that can strengthen your resolve to accomplish all your life goals. I want you to consider that the journey is more pleasurable than the destination similar to the countdown to Christmas or the next new year. You see planning a “thing” is more pleasurable and provides instant gratification than actually accomplishing said goal.

Tara Parker-Pope reports on How Vacations Affect Your Happiness and it turns out that having the blues after a vacation is an experience many encounters versus the joy planning brings; check out the article here. Take a few breaths and think about your ability to wait and the moments you feel defeated seeing others #win, wondering how did it happen for them overnight? Heres the real deal and what you need to remember:

  1. No pain no gain- you can not expect results with little to no efforts.
  2. Keep the end in mind – find time to reflect as many times you need to keep you on track.
  3. Envy is not becoming- there is no way you can truly know what someone else has done to get where they are #behumble.
  4. Manage a little – accomplish realistic goals first before craving the spotlight; to whom much is given much is required.

What’s Your Back Up Plan?

Company in the 6th post we talked about doubts and how to overcome and another old fashion trick is to plan. All companies plan for various reasons but the most important reason is to be and maintain success. Each one of us must do the same as this life is not promised even in purposefully shifting your life to create abundance. Whats your back up plan?

Last week was beyond busy and I found myself abandoning daily self care practices to tackle my “to do” list only to create anxieties and doubts that didn’t serve me. After all that crazy making, I thought about a better future for myself and ways to simplify the hum drum of the work week to create small successes each week. The truth however is that change is not easy, not overnight, will test you, requires reflection and a PLAN.

Here a 5 action steps you can take NOW to develop your plan. In all honesty “action” will be required and ongoing in preparing for your plan. These steps are an extension on The Daily 5 to make impact steps to change in your life. Lets work and keep evolving!

  1. Reflect: find a quite place allowing your mind space to think free of ALL distractions and write 1 or more goals in a category in the present tense “I will…”; “I have…”. (i.e. Health, Finances, Relationships, Work, Entrepreneurship)
  2. Schedule Appointments: set a time weekly, monthly, quarterly and yearly and keep it faithfully. You owe it to yourself to keep this time to review, edit and amend your goals.
  3. Review ALL accomplishments: it matters not how small the accomplishment; if it adds value to the bigger goal(s) its a win for you and reason to keep going.
  4. Keep a record: be honest with yourself here; don’t be satisfied with failure use it review, edit and amend your goal. As long as you are getting closer to you goal feel free to amend it because things happen and you have to adjust.
  5. Move forward: sometimes we get stuck in the past which keep us from achieving success. Failure is proof that you are trying so again review,edit and amend your goals until success.

What about your Doubts?

Company, as I reflected on the last post (3) #Company Rules to improve your personal power and navigating this week. I experienced doubts about decisions I’m making for a better future. Do you have doubts about that new job, your ex, or which direction to take to make an impact for change? Most companies review past results of the year and drill down to specifics to overcome or move on from doubt. Easier said than done but consider these insights as you read on.

I’ve mentioned putting your self first in past posts and I found more insight from Tiny Buddha writer Petrea Hansen-Adamidis listing “nurture yourself” as one of the ” 5 Steps to Deal with Self-Doubt and Trust Your Self Again”. Finding ways to achieve self-love through daily practice will challenge your ability to trust yourself and that your needs require attention to be your best self. We should remember that healing from within opens room for healthy relationships with boundaries.

Conversely another read from Tiny Buddha entitled ” How Lowering Our Expectations Helps Us Do What We Really Want to Do”; writer Elizabeth Voetsch says
“When we set our expectations high and then can’t quite reach them, it feels like we’ve failed, discouragement sets in, and we tend to give up. “Can you recall a time when expectations of ourselves and other people either prevented; caused an issue or affected you emotionally? I raise both hands here because it so easy to get caught up in your head rather than going for what you want and just forgive yourself for being human. No heavy lifting, let expectations go, act with purpose and use intelligence!

After putting yourself first and adjusting your expectations, how do you maintain momentum? Here’s another suggestion from Monica Castenetto from Tiny Buddha entitled, “My fighting spirit is a great resource to have in my life toolbox”. Monica says “I can call upon it when I need it. It adds to my resilience and self-reliance when life gets tough. And I also find that it comes in handy when I want to make changes for the better in my life, but struggle with the unforeseen complexities of, or resistance to what I want to do.” What a powerful statement, these tools are methods and practices that are mental (meditation), physical (exercise) or prescriptive( counseling or planning)

What about your doubts? Reflect on how doubt has held you back from achieving your best and take action toward your greatness; keep evolving!

(3) #CompanyRules To Improve Your Personal Power

Company, what have you done to improve your strength through knowledge? Making money for any business takes times but to remain profitable reflections are required. This week is one of reflection on your gains and losses through self-work. To my old and new company set aside 10 minutes to improve your personal power TODAY!

Rule # 1: Access the Damage, just the facts, please!

Read Time: 1 minute; link below!https://companyrules.home.blog/2019/02/13/strength/

Rule #2: Plan Purposefully and Act!

Read Time: 1 minute… link below!

https://companyrules.home.blog/2019/02/18/acting-without-fear/

Rule #3: Take Out the Trash

Read Time: 1 minute…link below!

https://companyrules.home.blog/2019/02/25/seeking-paradise/

Actions Steps

Now spend the last 5-7 minutes crafting realistic purposeful action steps you can accomplish in March…go! We will check in on your successes in May; keep evolving.

  1. Define the Problem
  2. Analyze the Facts
  3. Clarify and Prioritize the Problem
  4. Clearly Define the Goal
  5. Monitor, Evaluate, Repeat!